There is no remedy for love but to love more.

Life isn't as simple as just an explanation

2012-01-26T06:11:00.000-08:00

Hi all. School's been very nasty towards me ever since it started.

Life was full of complications and obstacles that I have to overcome. However, I am glad to say that despite all the unfortunate things that befalled me, I have a boy who have always been by my side. He has never once left me, no matter how dfficult things are. I've no idea why, but I have become a quite pessimistic person, always thinking that any issues or problems can never be resolved and I get all stressed up keeping everything to myself. I was never like this in the past but maybe due to certain things, it kind of changed me. And so, I was talking about this boy who showed me unconditional care and love, standing by my side and never onced leave me. He is a guy whom I'd never thought I'll get together with. It's least expected but true enough, it miraculously happened. I got to know him through a friend called B. It was his birthay, and invited me to celebrate with them because B's got a friend who wants to get to know me. And so happen that D was there with them. Weren't talking much during the birthday celebration until we were on the cab home with another friend. Started talking, started texting, started meeting almost every other day, unknowingly.. got together. It's been 5 months now.

I am proud to say that he is unlike any guys out there. Been through a lot, fallen in love and fallen out of love. But I have never met anyone as special as this.

He loves me as much as I do.

He showed me a love that he never onced had.

He gives me the strength to carry on with everything that I faced.

He gave me the courage to overcome certain situations.

He makes me feel that life is meaningful and I must always be optimistic.

He allows me to foresee my future with him in it.

He taught and proved to me that dogs, like humans, really have feelings in them.

He taught me how to be messy and untidy just like him.

He showed me what's true love by accepting all of my flaws and loving me wholeheartedly.

He is always there to guide me and teach me about life lest I'm too naive.

He pick me up when I was too drunk during a classmate's chalet.

He tolerated everything about me when I get drunk or cranky.

He reassured me whenever I needed reassurances and never onced complain.

He cooks for me when I'm hungry, (most of the time)

He brings me out to eat my favorite food although we might be penniless at times.

He allows me to go on an adventure with him, exploring all the funny and famous foods.

He made me believe in him and have faith in him.

He went against his principles just for me and I'm so happy he did it for me as it showed me that I'm different from the other girls he dated.

He stayed up late nights sacrificing his beauty sleeps just to make videos for me, and they are really special ones. Not the ones you find from any other boyfriends out there.

He allows me to be myself, not having to put up a fake front just to impress him.

He tells me that I'm beautiful even though I've no make up on and the late nights that ruined my complexion.

He says that he loves me like he have never before.

He have dreams and ambitions which many of the guys out there don't.

He is a man of his words and doesn't make empty promises.

He allows me to stick my feet into his face.

He doesn't freak out when I did something really gross which was plucking a vegetable that was stucked onto my braces and rub it onto his arm. (Guess he was too used to it)

He puts my welfare before himself and I really really appreciate it.

He brought me to meet all his relatives and I really like interacting with them.

He gave me a bunch of keys of my own and gave it to me as a surprise and that really assured me a lot as he has never done that to any girls before.

All of these things that he have done, I really appreciate them and I will never forget them like how I forgot some of the things my ex boyfriends have done. The main reason for this post is just to talk a little about this special boy who came into my life by accident and stayed on purpose.

Ohm Mani

2011-10-03T19:01:00.000-07:00

Hi guys I'm coming back to keep this blog alive, if only possible. My second day working at Ohm Mani at 69A Haji Lane. Do come visit me if you happen to pass by. Hehe. Working here's very boring and time passes real slowly. Been camwhoring almost half of the time. More pictures on facebook.

Meeting Zhiyan for dinner later and I might be heading to disco, but not for long. Can't wait for my braces appointment tomorrow morning. And I'm working here again tomorrow!! Hopefully I won't look odd in braces though. Work today is okay, 2 good men came to visit me, named Jun Jie and Andy ha ha ha.

Ok till here.

Amber 21 & Tab

2011-06-26T01:36:00.000-07:00

These are photos from Amber 21 the other day, didn't manage to take any from Tab. :) I'm so hungry. Going to cook something to eat now.

It's the way you look at me in the eyes

2011-06-25T00:46:00.000-07:00

So, I'm feeling so guilty about yesterday. I didn't intend to club, I just agreed to go boatquay to drink with Zhiyan and her classmates. I feel ashamed to say this but I actually went to Tab! Because all of them are asking me to go!! Took lots of photos at Amber21, wondering if I look really cui in them. Hahaha cause I was out the whole day yesterday and I admit I feel very haggard! Yesterday was a long day for me, woke up at 8am and got home the next morning at 6plus (which is this morning).

Woke up this afternoon at 1pm as I had to go fetch Emmanuel from pasir ris interchange at 4plus. Had really little sleep and I'm very very sleepy now. Emmanuel is asking me to go V4 hahaha, keep tempting me but nope! I'm not going. :) I haven't touch my books and I'm left with saturday and sunday. Where got time.. :( There's this boy who's watching movie at cine now, enjoy only ah! Hahaha when I get the photos I'll post it up, trying to rush Sheryl for it now heh heh. Ok I need to sleep now. Gonna wake up at 8am tomorrow and have a nice breakfast. :) Goodnight World!

Boy, you're so lovable.

2011-06-23T14:30:00.000-07:00

Today's kind of a busy day for me. Woke up at 8am, got myself prepared and trained down to Xpressworks. Bought my blusher from Tonymoly heh heh. Headed to tampines mall Starbucks, waited for Morgan from 12pm till now and he still hasn't arrive!! He must be sleeping -.- So I think I'm suppose to study now but I was so distracted using my laptop. And decided to blog. :) Tonight got many many events. Friends all asking me to go but I doubt my parents will allow furthermore, mst is this coming monday! :( I'm going to screw up my first mid semester test.. Haiyehh.

And did I mention that my parents are going overseas on July 6? They won't be here with me to celebrate my birthday on the day itself, disappointing:( On the other hand, I'll have freedom for 1 week hee. But too bad, I've got school. So, not much of a difference hahah! Anyway I'm really bored at starbucks alone now. Lonelygirl93 :'(

Going back to the past,

2011-06-20T15:24:00.000-07:00

My blog is so dead, I shall keep it alive whenever I'm free. Hmm exam's next week, and I'm gonna start today. But I also realised my speed is super slow. And i can only blame myself for not catching up with work during school days. Three weeks of holidays, I burned two whole weeks. I hate last minute work, yet I'm always doing so. Contradicting much? :/

My friend posted this quote on facebook and I just think it applies to me now- It hurts the most, when someone who made you feel special yesterday makes you feel like you are the most unwanted person today.

During this holiday, I went to club for the first and second time at powerhouse. I think it sucked big time. Maybe because it's event. Anyway my birthday is coming soon yeah ^^ I used to have plans but now I don't even have the time to think about it. Examination's stressing me out so much. I really don't wish to repeat my last year's footsteps:(

And also, I met up with my primary school friend Ted and Gerwyn for dinner and Kbox. Hahaha. Used to spend my time everyday with Jinda, but haven't been seeing him for quite awhile already. Nowadays, I think i drink a bit too much. It's either I'm drinking outside, or home. For like every single day? Went to Mbk on saturday night with Shan and some other friends, been sooo long since I stepped into a thai disco, hehe.

I should go and study already. Will update again soon!:)

Haven't felt this way for years,

2011-05-15T23:28:00.000-07:00

Went to Muay Art Fitness today with Weiming, had some training there. Really drained away all my energy! Had dinner then Xiong sent me home. :) Hahaha should I join MAF?! But time management's another big problem :( School tomorrow, goodnight!

Town!! :)

2011-05-14T23:24:00.000-07:00

Headed to town with Jinda today, Centrepoint to choose the birks I gonna buy. And I was caught between the one strap (mocha) and 3 strap one (black). In the end I chose the mocha one instead. Reserved it and gonna go get it on Monday hehehe. Bump into Asher and caught up a little with Fadhli at scape. Today everyone got their own programmes lol!
We caught the movie, Priest. Went fareast to get shop around but didn't shop much. Bought some clothes that's all and I think I'm spending a little too much given the situation now!

My dad mentioned you just now, and I finally told him that we weren't together already. I'm home so early today! At like 10.20pm? Hehe. OMG DARYL AIDEN YOW IS SO AWESOME. HIS VOICE SO NICEEE.

I'm eating the mee xin mian now..

WHOOOOP!

2011-05-12T07:20:00.000-07:00

Had my first Muay thai training today and it was cool, fun and damn tiring! I hope muay thai will treat me nice in the future hahaha. I think my blog's dead, school has been hectic. Ever since I decided to study hard, I did. :) I didn't skip school hehe. Okay I need to bathe now I think I stink (I perspired soo much!) Advance goodnight!

M.Y

2011-04-24T17:21:00.000-07:00

Doing my Gen Ed project and gonna start on econs homework soon. School tomorrow, life's so mundane once again. I suddenly don't feel like moving house already. From woodlands to SP is just as far:'( I MISS MY PINK SWAROSKI HEART PENDANT :''(

Sentosa/Scream4

2011-04-17T19:13:00.000-07:00

Went to Yishun after FOP on thursday with some poly mates and Jaryl to drink, played lan and almost died. Was dead tired that day. Homed at about 5am and slept. Woken up by a call and went to meet Zhiyan, Jeremy and Apple at whitesands at about 2plus pm. Headed to Sentosa and just chilled at Wavehouse, watching those wave boarding. Dinner at Crystal Jade then movie at Plaza Sing. (Scream 4) Got home at 3plus am I think.

Met Janelle on saturday evening and Aloy after that. How to heal a broken heart??

Geek

2011-04-09T00:26:00.000-07:00

Busy with work. And I can't believe it, guess what. It's so 'last minute' for me, school's starting this coming monday! Heh heh, not mentally prepared yet. Hope everything goes well for me ^^ wish me luck haha. Love this babyboy of mine, heee~

I'd like to hold you in my arms again..

2011-04-05T01:45:00.000-07:00

My heart's still with the one whom I gave it to 6 months ago..

Nowadays, it's work and home, work and home. Life has become something so mundane with nothing to look forward to. How sad. However, school's starting in about 2 weeks time and it's high time for me to get back to studying. No more distractions, I'll have to focus on my studies now. I can't afford to waste any more time anymore.. It's time for me to wake up, and think about what I really want in my life, what kind of life I want to lead in the future. I'm not a young anymore, hahaha so sad, gonna turn 18 in like.. umm 3 months' time? Heh heh. It's 1.30am now, it's time for bed. However whether I can fall asleep is a different thing altogether! Hahahaa, alright goodnight all! :)

What are words,

2011-03-30T00:43:00.000-07:00

I really wished you could have been nicer towards me.. Chris Medina is such a great guy, he really inspires me. I can really feel him, I believe that's what called true love. It's really sucha sad song! I think I've hit the replay button for like uncountable times. Guys should really learn from him! I left work earlier I simply have no mood to continue with it. Anyone have any idea whether Singapore Poly's department of academic is opened now(during holidays)? I haven't receieved their letter till now and I'm worried sick! ( about my place this year as I actually deferred last year) WHAT SHOULD I DO NOW?!!

I just want to say: Whenever I pick out something bad about you, the only reason is that I want to help you to change to be a better person. No other meaning. But you can actually choose to break up with me again, after all my explanations. I don't know if I should even be explaining to you, but I guess I don't owe you any explanation anymore. I want to ask you, like the song above, what are words if you really don't mean them when you say them?

I can give you those assurances when you needed, while all I get is 'break up' from you when all I wanted to hear was your gentle voice, assuring me. I really don't think I've let you down in any ways, or maybe I'm just not up to your expectations. I have no fucking idea why we'll end up in such a sour relationship when we were so loving and sweet in the first 3 months. I can't think of any reason why. It's been 6 months now. We talked about it, we compromised, we said we will go back to how it was at the start. Why can't we just see a change? How happy we were when we were on our first date, when I decided to give you a chance to be the guy I'm going to rely on for life.. Sometimes, when you're angry, you just don't think. You don't think why I'm doing this, you don't put yourself in my shoes. You just think you are right. Maybe I was like this too in the past, but why can't you see the change in me, it's all for your sake. I've got so many whys in my head.

I love you, no one can ever take away the memories of what we once had.

"You can be in a crowd of thousands of people but still feel so alone"

2011-03-25T11:11:00.000-07:00

Sometimes when time goes by, it makes you wonder where you actually stand. By this time, I'd already got everything figured out, how to be happy and how to conquer all the shits that I face.

I have no idea what time I fell asleep. Because when my sister woke up for school, I'm still awake!

You can go back to your last time you, flirt and club. Keep wanting girls to like you or whatever. If you want your life to be this kind, just continue doing what you think is right. But I don't want to see you living your life this way, really such a waste.

My boyfriend stole my shirt

2011-03-24T05:13:00.000-07:00

Happy 1,2,3,4,5,6th monthsary baby!! ♥

Then we spotted this cute little yellow thing..

As you can see, we went to Sentosa together, and it's our first time going to Sentosa togeher. :) I was very happy that day because I got to take alot of photos with babyboy, that's not all. The rest are in facebook. And I got to eat a very very huge cotton candy at beach station! Forgot to take a picture of it :'( So, we literally went to all 4 stations, one after another as we slowly stroll down the whole stretch of Sentosa. However, we got so beat and restless because of the scorching evening sun, we didn't get to finish walking the whole of sentosa :( Nevermind, baby we shall go again soon ok? I wanna go for the packages hehehe like so fun!I It was a fruitful day, and we had one video taken, was so silly! But i didnt know how I can rotate it :/

Sentosa was on last monday. And on tuesday, we went Malaysia with my maternal great parents, my mom and my yi po. My grandparents drove us in. Shopped at KSL, went to the other part of Malaysia to visit my grandfather's bio keng friend, had seafood by the sea, went groceries shopping at The Store, then home sweet home. The most fun I had of the day was to be able to spend time with baby, all the food I ate yummy!! And also when we got missing when we couldn't find the way back to Johor Bahru, hahaha. Sad thing was, 1) my goal that day was to visit City Square to get my masks yet we didn't have time to go there. 2) Wanted to catch a movie there but due to time constraints, we couldn't..

Anyway just to top it off, I really had much fun for the past few days. And I couldn't find time to blog :( Will be going for the macbook pro briefing at Ion tomorrow, before there will need to attend another work briefing at bugis, it's gonna be a busy day! And will be starting another survey job this coming monday, super sian!

A love that don't come easy.

2011-03-17T23:42:00.000-07:00

I'm sorry for not keeping this blog alive, been super uber busy for the past few weeks. Hardly had time to use the laptop to sit down and do a proper post. :'( But I've caught quite a number of movies so far, like.. 127 hours, Just go with it, I can't remember if I've mentioned it before already hahaha memory's failing me these days! Adjustment Burea, Unknown, My ex 2 Haunted Lover, I am number four (certainly a great show!!), Red riding hood. Okay I can't recall any others for now. Baby and I have been hitting the gym, swimming, to summarise, we've been together for almost every single day. :)

Been awhile since we went Kbox so we'll probably head there tomorrow, $6 only for now till 31 March ^^

Baby you know, I really don't wish to suffer the feeling of losing you again. It really sucks and it feels like I'm gonna lose you and will never have you by my side ever again. Our love doesn't come easy, how we'd met in the past, how we started talking, how our friendship got closer and closer and became good friends, how we got together and became lovers, everything that we did, all our memories, everything we've been through to keep this relationship going, every effort we put together, all the perserverence and 'persisting' shit that you've been doing just to make me happy. Baby, I trust everything you tell me. I trust that you'll give me happiness and I trust that with you, from now on every day will be a happy day. I'll never want to lose you and to start another relationship all over again, it's really tiring! Nothing can ever replace what we once had & what we once felt. I love you babyboy.

Happy 5 months! ♥

2011-02-23T23:30:00.000-08:00

Hi baby, happy 5th monthsary! ♥ We sure have had many bad times now, no doubt. But surprisingly, look we're still stucked together like superglue. Hehe. Although you're not the longest guy I've been with, but you're the guy which I've been through together many special occasions. I'll never forget the sweet and memorable birthday you had at mbs, the lovely bouquet of roses on Valentines, the late night movies and strolling home together, playing reversi trying to beat each other and making each other pissed off (our freshest memories haha), making pizza together and finishing them on our own, sleeping with my contact lens on twice when I'm totally wear out from the whole day of working while you're studying, not to forget showing off the shou bao! And many many more other sweetest romance. :)
I really want you to be that patient guy, who'll not be short tempered easily. The guy who will stand by me like my pillar of strength, who will support me in whatever I do, who will be there for me as a punching bag when I'm down, who will listen to my old grandmother stories when I am frustrated, who will lend me his shoulders whenever I needed one, who will be my personal clown to make me laugh when I'm sulky, who will invite Mr. sunshine to come out when my days are gloomy, who will take me for a holiday which I always wanted to, who will cry for me when I bully him, who will laugh at me when he thinks I'm cute or funny, who will pat my head and tell me 'Well done girl!' when I achieve great heights or maybe a good deed, who will always be there for me 24/7 and always reachable, who will cab down to my place to find me when I needed him by my side, who will sing From The heart with me, who appreciates me for who I am and lastly, love me truely with all his heart.

We've made it through this 5 months. Another 5 months will not be a difficult task as long as we both know what we ought to do ^^
Maybe sometimes we'll get very sick of each other because of the fights we have, but fret not, as long as our love's still there, it will conquer all my dear.
I ♥ You babyboy. :)

My heart's all yours.

2011-02-21T18:48:00.000-08:00

Like a rockstar, hahaha

This year's my first year officially celebrating Valentines with a boyfriend. And not someone who's courting me or someone who hasn't got together with me. And I really think it's awesome celebrating this day with my beloved. It beats anything else in the World. Valentines day is a day to express the feelings a couple have for each other, to appreciate how much we went through together, to look back at the long road which we've walked through together, to admire each other and say what we love most about each other. It's also a day when we girls get to receieve flowers, cards and a gift. Or maybe chocolate..
This year is a very special one for me, because I celebrated with my babyboy and it's full of surprises. He confused me with what he'd bought for me and I was taken in by him. Unexpectedly, he bought me a bouquet of roses. I love whatever he had given me and I'll cherish them for sure! Till now, I still find it very very amazing at how we actually met each other, how we got together, and how we lasted for almost going 5 months now. And it's gonna be half year really soon. ^^ I'm not asking for much, I just want us to be stay happy and be true to each other.

Xoxo,
Natalie

Valentines day

2011-02-15T15:00:00.000-08:00

Dined at Marina Square, cabbed to downtown east and caught the Andy lau's show, What women want. Babyboy walked me to my house area and we met up with Zx for a short while. Got home at 4am. Been skipping work for a long long time already.

This was what I made for baby, and also gave him one Zippo lighter which was detached from the Diy board already. :) I hope he likes what I made for him.

What a day!

2011-02-10T23:27:00.000-08:00

Met Janelle at Tampines today and went around to get some stuffs. Looking for nice photo albums but yet to find any that catch my eyes. :( Went Jean yip for free manicure thanks to Janelle^^ Headed to bugis workplace to settle some work then bought a shawl. Trained to cityhall and went to paper market and spent a bomb there, that will be a surprise for my babyboy hehes. I think we stayed in the shop for more than 1 or 2 hours, hahah. Next destination was fareast. Been ages since I went there to shop, I think few years already. And I realised that the clothes there are actually quite nice, bought lots of stuffs and spent another bomb. Very satisfied and my day was very very fruitful I must say! :) I'm exhausted, and I think I'm gonna be down with a fever, I can feel it coming. Having a serious, bad flu now! :(

However, I didn't join babyboy and his family for dinner at Coca. His dad's going overseas and I wish him bon voyage! I'm sooo looking forward to making the DIY thing for this boy of mine and surprise him with it. I hope he likes it although I know he might not appreciates such stuffs :( Maybe you'll just chuck it one side after receieving it and never look at it again, right? :[ Or maybe just hide it in a drawer..

Ok till here I'm going to bed, work tomorrow!! I know I can do it ^^ I miss you dear, I want to give you a great big hug tomorrow when I see you.

I wonder,

2011-02-08T15:00:00.000-08:00

what are you doing now.. Still sleeping? I miss you.
hehe listen to this baby, 'can't stand it'.

Like we used to

2011-02-07T19:39:00.000-08:00

I'm most afraid to lose you,

Surprisingly, A and I, we went through alot. So much that I don't know how I'm able to write everything down into words. Getting together was a tough task, being together was another thing altogether.

Breaking up was the most heart wrenching.

I miss those times when both of us hasn't shown our temper,

I miss those times at kbox, I miss those times prawning at faraway places, I miss those times when we were catching guppies,

I miss your ai xin meal, I miss you kissing my forehead whenever we part,

I miss hearing you say I love you, I miss catching every single movies with you in the cinema, I miss you singing randomly,

I miss your laughter when I made you laugh, I miss you pushing me on the swing,

I miss you sending me home everytime, I miss craving for teppanyaki with you, I miss walking all the way from amk hub to your place singing together as we stroll,

I miss waking up to your kisses,

I miss the great big hug from you, I miss picking you up from school, I miss how I celebrated your birthday at mbs and buying another small piece of cake on the actual day,

I miss taking photos with you, I miss cycling with you at pulau ubin, I miss you picking me up from work, I miss you pouring a cup of water for me when I kept coughing at night, I miss you telling me I'm beautiful,

I miss you accompanying me to run my errands,

I miss you passing me herbal tea every day when I was sick, I miss flying kites with you,

I miss eating steamboats, I miss calling you sticky worm,

I miss going wildwildwet with you,

I miss the efforts you put in when you were wooing me, the unconditional love you gave me

, the shoulder that is always there for me whenever I needed it. I miss the assurances you always give me when I thought I might lose you anytime. On the whole, I miss the Old you.

We've yet to dine together at dempsey hill, we've yet to go Holland Village to eat,

We've yet to dine at Jewel box on valentines, we've yet to go sky dining, we've yet to go universal studio,

we've yet to go on bungee which you've promised, I've not made the card I always wanted to give you on Valentines.

We've yet to travel together, we've yet to go on a cruise, we said we wanted to go mbs together again next time.

There are many more things that I miss about you,

but there are also many things I don't miss too.

I think,

everything about me and you is regret.

Gambling kills!

2011-02-06T06:02:00.000-08:00

Went to Kbox yesterday, then babyboy went Justacia to eat. So I slept at 5plus am this morning because I was out to gamble with bby and friends, hehehe although I lost money but it still feels great being able to touch the cards! Woke up at 11am, so obviously I didn't have enough sleep :(
Daddy sent me to babyboy's place while they went over to granny's house. Supposed to go over after bai nian at babyboy's house but was too tired to travel the long distance. Caught The Rebound at Amk hub with babyboy, I'd say it wasn't as nice as I'd expected, the storyline.

Babyboy sent me home after that. :)

Reunion dinner

2011-02-02T21:29:00.000-08:00

I want this,

In the future, I wanna have my wedding video filmed at Paris or maybe Tokyo or maybe Mauritius..? During autumn/winter. :) hehe, haven't made up my mind yet. And I want to celebrate christmas at Finland one day.

Baby's over at Malaysia right now with his family and relatives, sigh and I'm missing him so badly:( Baby you're such an angel, everytime you smile the world seems to stop and stares at you for a while, because you're just amazing just the way you are. Hurry come back to Singapore!!

I've something to confess, I really think this year's lunar new year is super boring. Doesn't feel as thrilled as when I was 6. What about you guys?

Deprived childhood, hahaha

2011-01-30T23:18:00.000-08:00

So basically, I started building a lego house and baby joined me, yesterday. Baby came over my house today and I helped him with his animation work. :) Going SGH on tuesday with mom, I'm scared.. :(

You're my everything,

2011-01-30T00:35:00.000-08:00

Was home with boyfriend and family the whole of this afternoon, played with legos with baby and pictures are in my camera which is at his place now. :) Had instant noodles with topshell for lunch with dearest. Yummy. After playing lego, was so lethargic and went to nap for one hour plus. Woke up and headed to upper thomson with his parents for chicken rice. Back to his place, watched television for a short while then baby sent me home. God, I think I got the best boyfriend in this world for he's so so so nice to send me home each and every time regardless of good or bad weather. & it was raining heavily just now!

Don't give up! :)

2011-01-27T14:41:00.000-08:00

Early in the morning I went over to baby's house. The 'Ai Xin Meal' was a failure, hahaha baby don't be sad. You can always cook for me again next time without any disturbance from your ahem. Baby left for school and I went home, slept in the bus but it was so uncomfortable and scorching! I can't take a nap now, got to rush to tampines by 430pm.

From yesterday's,

As you can see, the quality is shit because it's from my phone, hehehe.
I'll try to come back with more pictures! :)

Cookie Monster,

2011-01-27T01:59:00.000-08:00

Surfed the net for recipes this morning, deciding on what to make for baby on Valentine's day^^ And I finally made up my mind after being sooo fickle minded changing my ideas here and there.
Realised I was going to be late as I was so engrossed in searching all the different recipes, I hurry bathed and train all the way down to Clementi then cabbed from Clementi to NP. :) It was raining so heavily and I forgot to bring my umbrella. Luckily I had my cap with me, if not I'll be drenched from head to toe. Unfortunately, my heels were soaked with rainwater, irks me like hell! Till now, it's not dry yet urghh.

Headed to Queensway shopping centre with baby after his school to hunt for his cap. In the end, bought him this cap of some baseball brand which was quite costly! But as long as he likes it, why not? :) He's a cap fanatic now, (out of the blue). Had katong laksa there, weren't that nice but still, it satisfied my cravings hehe. Then went to his place, drank herbal soup made by his mom, watched the 9pm show then baby sent me home. :)

Had a pretty enjoyable day today. Will be going over to his place tomorrow morning at 8am because he wants to cook for me to make it up to me. Wah, supposed to be he come over to cook for me yet now I need to be the one going there because of his school!! Hahaha. Took some photos with my phone today, will upload them tomorrow or the day after. I forgot to charge my camera :( Will be meeting Janelle tomorrow over at Tampines, miss you!

I got to go to bed now, or else I will not be able to wake up at 8 am tomorrow! Goodnight all :)

DÓ ŷŌU ĶnÓŴ..

2011-01-26T00:22:00.000-08:00

No matter who you date, someone somewhere isn't going to like it. But as long as you love him, it's all worth it.
The best things in life are always the ones worth fighting for.

Just reached home not long ago, baby sent me home :) I'm going to turn in soon. No work for the next few days till next week, super duper sian :( Anyone got one week job to intro? Hm..

Will be picking up this monster from school tomorrow and going buy him a cap. And I'm craving for katong laksa hopefully we can have it for dinner tomorrow. Hehe. Anyway, there's so many shops claiming that they are genuine katong laksa. So, any idea which shop has the most genuine/tasty katong laksa? I've yet to find out because I haven't tried every shop's. :(
Anyone knows of nice place for katong laksa? :)

I am going to turn in now, goodnight all, goodnight baby.
I ♥ U, Tan Jian Wei ^^

HELP!

2011-01-25T13:15:00.000-08:00

Ok currently, I need people living in Elias Green condo to help me with a survey about social attitudes of Singaporeans. Anyone staying at Elias Green willing to help me? If anyone is reading this and is qualified to help me with it, do drop me a comment at my formspring. It's a very short survey. Help will be greatly appreciated! :)

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I♡Mommy!

Just came back from buying one can of New moon abalone, the Australian red coloured one, and one Golden Chef Pacific clams, will be bringing it over to baby's house tonight for his parents. And Kim told me there another promotion which comes 4 cans in a box, mixture of abalone and other stuff at a cheaper price! Haha but I bought it already, toooo late! I am supposed to work now but it's raining heavily. And I don't think I can get any Elias green residents, sigh :( I'm going to take a rest now, what a nice weather! Looking forward to meet my boyfriend :D

Wanted to upload a video but it can't seem to load!

Happy 4th monthsary ♥

2011-01-23T12:07:00.000-08:00

Formspring. :)

We've been made through a long way now. But I don't know why you're always still so insecured and sensitive, making a big fuss out of a slightest thing. I am happy whenever we are happy, whenever things are smooth sailing. I don't want to talk about the unhappy stuff.
Anyway you should know that you mean alot to me, I don't know what else to say. But the feeling is that I just never want to lose you. But sometimes things get contradicting, when you make me upset... I really wanted to post a happy and sweet 4th monthsary but then it seems like I'm not inspired to type anything.

But I have to say baby, I feel so lucky to have you because other guys might not be able to do what you've done, or been doing for me all these while. I know at times we do get really frustrated with each other, I don't know but I guess things will get better in time to come?
Or maybe all these quarrels are the ones that pull us through this. Urghh but I don't want it!! :(

Just to top it off,

H a p p y 4 t h M o n t h s a r y B a b y b o y .

I am going over to Amk to find you now, and help you rush through your homework. Hope you can pass up tomorrow in time. :)

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Watched baby doing his work all the time just now but when I was too bored and tired, I slept in for about 2 hours, according to what he said. Hahaha. It's been so long since I took an afternoon nap and I feel so refresh and great after that! :) After I woke up, I went to open his fridge to hunt for something to eat. And his dad asked me if I was hungry already, then he brought us out to eat at I think.. near Macpherson road. Back to baby's house after that and he continued with his work. He says he might not be sleeping tonight as he got to rush this piece of work. Hmm.. I hope he will be able to complete earlier and catch some sleep, baby or else you won't have the fighting spirit for school tomorrow know!! I'm turning in soon, work tomorrow! :(
Goodnight all. Today's a happy day hehe ^^ Again, happy 4 months dear! :)

formspring.me

2011-01-22T21:01:00.001-08:00

Ask me anything http://formspring.me/natalieong

What else is there to say

2011-01-21T16:26:00.000-08:00

Formspring. :)

Girls, does creating a formspring cause your boyfriend to quarrel with you? Hmm..

formspring.me

2011-01-20T23:12:00.001-08:00

Ask me anything http://formspring.me/natalieong

Flowers and bears?

2011-01-19T20:22:00.000-08:00

I've been neglecting this space because of my hectic schedule and here I am to keep this thing alive. I had caught quite a number of movies with baby, Meet the folkers, The tourist, The ghost must be crazy, Seasons of the witch and Gulliver's travel as far as I could remember. I want to get my Agnes B bag and polaroid!!! :( Valentines day coming. Hehehe don't know someone will buy for me or not.....

Breeze my way through

2011-01-11T16:21:00.000-08:00

Today he might say he loves you, but you will never know if he will feel the same way tomorrow.

I just need someone to cycle me around the whole of east coast park.

The ABC of LOVE

Ask her name
Buy her flowers
Call her at night
Dance with her
Eat lunch with her
Favourite her as your lady
Go with her to the beach
Hug her tight
Invite her to dinner
Just be with her all the time
Kiss her on her cheeks and lips
Love her from
Morning until
Night
bring her Over to Paris
and make her your Queen
give her a Ride everyday
and make her feel Safe in your arms
don't let her cry a Tear
and always just Understand her
stay until the Very end
and make her put up Wide smiles on her face
and swear to X
Your ❤ for her will never die
nothing for Z just want you to Zee (see) that I really love you

Another row, :/

2011-01-05T22:22:00.000-08:00

Guess what? Flew down to Ngee Ann polytechnic to look for baby today, accompanied him for lunch and he insisted I go into the lecture hall with him. -.- Didn't want to attract attention as I'm not a student there but I still gave in to this baby of mine in the end. Headed to Amk hub and caught The Tourist, :)
There was a heavy pour when baby sent me home. I miss this baby boy of mine so much!

Anyway, I am so furious. Because I can't find the usb cable for my Ipod, zzz. I searched the entire house and turned it upside down, but I found nothing. Urghh.

On the actual day,

2011-01-02T22:44:00.000-08:00

Went whitesands to get a slice of cake and headed to baby's place. Sang a birthday song for him, gave him a peck on his cheeks on his actual day. His daddy came and pick us up and went to International plaza, Coca for dinner. They drove me home after that.

Just a little more to let my precious boy know how dearly he is to me,
I want to thank you for being in my life, and I hope you will stay in my life for as long as possible. You taught me how to love and trust when I almost forgotten how to. You found me when I lost myself. You pick me up when I was at the lowest point of my life, you gave me the courage and you made me have faith in you. You proved to me that you're real. You made me the happiest girl. Once again, happy 20th birthday Old man. :) You'll always be my 老头. Ha ha. Goodnight. :)

baby's birthday, :)

2010-12-31T21:42:00.000-08:00

The rest of the photos will be uploaded in facebook sooon,

So basically, I was at Mbs yesterday to celebrate an advance birthday for my dearest. I think it's probably the happiest day of my life. I feel blessed to be able to have you by my side, always showering me with the unconditional love. I feel lucky that you love me, out of many girls out there. I feel so happy whenever you say I look beautiful, even though I know there are many more prettier girls out there.

I might not be the smartest girl you know, I might not be the most beautiful girl you've seen, I might not be perfect, but for sure I'll be there to love you and care for you regardless of good or bad times. I love looking at your face, it makes me feel happy. And each time I gazed at your face, it always reminds me that I have the best and hottest boyfriend. Right now, I just want to be happy with you, free from quarrels. We got to keep this in mind: Every second we stay mad at each other is another moment we've lost forever.

Sure we do have really bad and torturous moments when I just felt like screaming at you till your ear drums burst, I believe you do get all cranky at me too? But whatever it is, I want you in my life and I want to be the girl whom you've been searching for.

Yesterday was a mixture of happiness, hilarious, fun, & memorable day, I can certainly say that I will never forget this special day of my life, 2 days before 2010 is coming to an end ^^ But we forgot our catchings and pillow fights because we were too engaged in taking photos, haha!

Baby, I'm happiest when I'm with you. :)

:(

2010-12-21T07:30:00.000-08:00

kbox yesterday with dear. I DREAD TO GO TO WORK :( urghh.

Big Sunflowers,

2010-12-19T16:43:00.000-08:00

Caught Rapunzel and Tron during past few days. Rapunzel was cute, and Tron was damn cool! Ate at Jang Shou Korean bbq restaurant at Katong Village yesterday with dearest. I'm staying home today, nice. Going to order Pizza hut now:) What a spread~

Overdue photos at Pulau Ubin,

2010-12-13T19:20:00.000-08:00

Just some of the photos taken with baby last last Saturday at Pulau Ubin :) Work's resuming tomorrow again, boring ttm!

Happy-or-not,

2010-12-11T21:43:00.000-08:00

Ever think that happy people are just people with no problems? Or maybe they are just delusional about life's real stresses?

A great piece of news on the road to happiness is that it's more about what's going on inside the brain and not what's going on outside of it. Meaning that it's possible to be full of joy despite life's struggles.

Happiness depends more on the inward disposition of mind than the outward circumstances.

1. Take off negative binders.
When a negative event occurs, stop and think, identify something that is positive that's also happening.

2. Share your appreciation.
When was the last time you thanked someone? Not just for obvious events like a stranger holding a door for you but also for more everyday happenings like : When your partner picks you up from work, or might have made you a simple meal, a spouse completing a chore. Expressing gratitude for what other people have done for you helps you to be more aware of the good that's right infront of you. It also increases the likelihood of that person repeating their actions in the future.

And right now, I just want to take this time to thank my boyfriend, Aloy for giving me his all. Thank you for picking me up from work yesterday, thank you for pouring me a cup of water at night when I kept coughing, thank you for heating up the fried rice for me this morning, thank you for sending me off to take the bus. You have to know that you're great and you are good enough for me. You're the one who taught me how to love. I'm sorry for giving you attitude yesterday night, and I hope you won't be mad at me anymore.

A train of thoughts,

2010-12-05T23:45:00.000-08:00

If you lost it all tomorrow, what would you miss most about today?

Paper Cranes

2010-12-02T01:07:00.000-08:00

Doing nothing everyday's boring. No point getting a job now because I've got so much things to do in my hands. I'm feeling very 'contradicting'. And this feeling really sucks.
Lovey dovey with baby, hardly any quarrels this few days. And I hope this will go on for a long period of time, haha. Meeting Tricia tomorrow to do some shopping, and as usual, will be meeting my babyboy after that. Pulau ubin on saturday!! I hope this time round, our plans won't be ruined^^

Headed to Tampines mall to get hello kitty speakers from courts with sister today and trained to Orchard. Shopped, bought some clothes and had tepanyaki for dinner. After parting with her, went to baby's place and watched the 9pm show there then baby sent me off to take bus.

Sometimes, I really hope we could actually try to give in a little on our own part so that we'll both end up in a better way. I hope you know, no one sees you like I do. No matter how many hundreds of girls who always look at you in the streets, in your school compound, you got to be aware of this : To me, you're the one and only best boyfriend. Sure we've had our bad times when we don't agree with each other and do something to piss the other off, but with you, I am willing to let down my pride and give in , at times to keep this love burning. Being with you makes me feel that I'm more or less settled down in a way or another. I want you to know that I hope we'll make it through & I love you from my heart. And you know what? The best part is, I'm starting to regret having inks on me. I just want to lead a simple and happy-ever-after life with you. Just you alone, I'm contented..

Jingle bell,

2010-11-29T00:57:00.000-08:00

I love Christmas!!:) Orchard's always so nicely decorated.

The rest of the photos are uploaded in facebook.
Went town to shop around and take lots of photos with baby on friday. On saturday, wanted to go pulau ubin but we woke up too late. So I guess we've to go on this coming saturday instead! Excited~

Went to hougang mall with baby, Damien and my sister today. Studied at there for a few hours then my sister and I went to make our nails :) I took so long to upload the photos in facebook urgh, going to turn in soon. Goodnight.

Happy 2nd months baby, ♥

2010-11-23T14:48:00.000-08:00

Picked baby up from school yesterday, indirectly. Because when I reached Clementi station while waiting for bus 184, he was already released from class. So he came over to Clementi mrt to meet me instead. Haha. Went to Raffles City, then headed to Orchard to bring Mom's coach bag for dry cleaning. It was me who made it dirty so.. :(
Went to Ngee Ann City to hunt for some restaurants and we decided on Angus house for steak on his birthday!:) It was a 'funny' day that day and I've to say we felt so much better laughing for so long.
Shopped around at Ion and baby bought for me a Zara shorts that attracted me and a top from Topshop. In turn, I went in to Fredperry and bought for baby a top which I really liked! ( He also likes it! )

Time passes so fast when I'm with baby, hope it will continue this way till the end of time. Hehehe. I'm just done with booking Mbs, on the 30th of December. Have to celebrate an advance birthday for baby, hope we are all gonna have so much fun! I want to give baby a most memorable birthday ever. Not to forget, I really need to thank baby's Mommy for agreeing to help me out by checking in for me because I'm not 21 yet. And, to our precious 2 guests : Let's give Aloy a wonderful 20th birthday! Hahaha wait for my invitation card okay ^^

To baby,

Thank you for tolerating my nonsense every now and then. You never failed to be by my side whenever I needed you. I will always cherish you for who you are, because I love you. It's our 2nd month today and there will be more months coming up ^^ Be patient okay! BB I love you~

Lesson learnt,

2010-11-21T18:21:00.000-08:00

I think both of us should take this as a lesson learnt and I hope none of these will happen again. I still love you all the same, just like always. B's coming over to my house now, I miss you! :)
After going through so much together, I don't wanna see this just end like this as well. Besides, I still love you.

What about this?

2010-11-21T03:04:00.000-08:00

Things will never be the same again. What's done is done. What's said is said. We'll never be able to take back our words. Just like what you said which hurt my heart. And then I said something to hurt your heart as well. All these words can never be taken back or treat it like it had never happened before just by giving a second chance. Who knows what life has in store for you? You might live even better in the future. I admit, I can't bear to let you go. I still love you. I've been very happy being together with you, except for the quarrels that we have somewhat..often? But the one thing I'm definitely sure of is that we will never be able to last as long as things continue this way.

Even after breaking up, I won't go back to my life last time, I won't go back to nightlife, I won't go clubs, I won't go Thai discos. I am a changed person, I never ever want to be someone who is useless and uncivilized anymore. This I promise you.

I know you've heard these words a hundred other times before
And you've been hurt and so,
your heart has chose to close the door.
Love broke your heart and brought you lies.

Yes, from the heart I'm giving you everything. Baby please don't cry, it really hurts me a lot to see you like this..
I don't want our relationship to just end like this after being through so much together. But I don't want us to have the same old quarrels over and over again. I really can't take this, it's too much for me.

I want you to be mine forever,

2010-11-19T14:21:00.000-08:00

Last wednesday,

Went to Johor with family, and some relatives together with babyboy. We had dim sums for lunch then went to Jusco to shop around. Upon reaching Singapore, headed to grandparents house before dining out. Daddy sent baby to a mrt station for his convenience to go home before we left for the dinner. How I hope babyboy could join us for the dinner:( Never mind, next time surely got the chance to!

Yesterday (thursday),

Baby came to meet me in the morning, we went central coffeeexpress to eat before he head to school. Cabbed to Haji lane with my sister and Kristy to shop. Bought some clothes:) My sister and Kristy then cab to go eat steamboat while I waited for baby to come Haji, bought a top for him and chilled somewhere before cabbing home.

I'm down with a terrible flu, urghh! Feverish + headache + nostrils stucked, can't breathe! It sucks to get sick, hate it ttm! Initial plan was to go down to Kovan with baby, sister and Damien to eat chilli crab + kangkong etc for dinner tonight. But it looks like we got to cancel it because of sickly Natalie. Disappointed, been awaiting for this day. And baby and I also planned to go out on saturday to town to catch a movie and also to go Mbs to ask about the booking of the different suites.

Not to forget, initially I wanted to give babyboy a surprise and book the Tanah merah safra resort for him to celebrate his birthday. However, it's all fully booked. Including the Changi SAF one. Then my second plan was to go cruise/bali with babyboy on his birthday. Asked my parents for permission but, I failed. I guess I'm still too young to go overseas with my friends/boyfriend. And also, perhaps the relationship's still on a rocky motion? And so, final plan will be booking a night at Mbs!:) I wanted resort world so I can go universal studio, till now I've not been to it yet:(

But babyboy doesn't want it, he's afraid of the rides!! -.-

I can't wait for baby to end school and meet him later on! ^^

Marina Bay Sands,

2010-11-15T11:01:00.000-08:00

Mbs was great, the scenery was nice, the long stretch of pool looks attractive. But I didn't like the pressure when I was in the lift. Haha. Left the hotel at about 9plus pm then headed to Kovan for chilli crab with Alwin, Geri, Hui min, Chris and of course, baby!! Took bus 81 home after that^^
I might be going to cityhall later to get the BirkenStocks slipper for sweetheart, and also to shop around. Night time go Asli Village for dessert to support uncle Sam.

Anyway people, if you're free head down to downtown east Asli village at downtown east, Aranda dessert, stall 14 to support ok^^ Thanks!:)

I hope everything will be okay,

2010-11-11T19:09:00.000-08:00

Tomorrow will be going for an interview at Toapayoh in the morning. Then going town with my sister after that, going to get my Mom's birthday present as well as baby's Dad's present. Might be picking baby up from school then go celebrate his Dad's birthday:)
As for saturday, will be going over to Marina Bay Sands for Venie's birthday. Will be bringing baby along too:)
Gonna have an early sleep tonight, woke up at 615am this morning -.-

Anxious Natalie,

2010-11-10T14:25:00.000-08:00

Tomorrow will be the day.. Hmm I got to be strong, I've to believe in myself and believe in God. I hope everything's gonna be alright. Although it seems to me that it's gonna be tough and it won't be much on the brighter side, but still I need to pray for the best~

Well..

2010-11-09T15:17:00.000-08:00

Going over to Amk to meet Baby later. As the the day gets nearer, I'm feeling more stressed! :(
Sigh. I need to get prepared now, goodbye~

Back with pictures @ Marina Barrage,

2010-11-07T12:57:00.000-08:00

More at facebook^^ Had lots of fun with baby today, I wonder when's the next outing again? (Baby I'm hinting you to plan! hehe.) Am so freaking tired now~

Marina Barrage

2010-11-06T15:07:00.000-07:00

I'm heading over to Marina barrage in about 15 minutes time,

Picnic + fly Kites, (Y)!

Will be back with pictures~

Sticky Worm,

2010-11-05T02:00:00.000-07:00

Went Fu lu shou with my grandma and my sister to have our fortunes read. Accompanied grandma to eat afterwards. Wanted to send my grandma home first before heading to pick baby up from school together with my sister as she wants to pick Damien up too but we were pressed for time, so didn't send her back:(
Felt so bad and worried for her. After picking the two boys up, went to whitesands to have dinner then pasir ris park playground to chill. Home sweet home aftermath:) I'm going to sleep now, goodnight!

Shangri La Hotel,

2010-11-03T02:34:00.000-07:00

Went to Liling's birthday chalet on monday. Happy belated birthday to Liling (tho I've wished you already!)
Stay pretty and study hard, hope you get good results for your psle and enter a good school:)

Worked as an Usher at Shangri La Hotel today for Shanshan biao yi. Asked Chelsea and Yu en to work together too. It was stressful as I was very tensed, I had to go up to the stage and be the usher to guide people. And guess what, Minister Mr Teo Chee Hean was there + many big-shots people. So it was a very tensed moment for me, for a first timer of course. Met new people there during work and most of them were very nice, except for the client who made complains about some of my working mates and I.

I miss my boyfriend so much, whole of today didn't get to see his pretty face:( Will be meeting him tomorrow^^
I'm so looking forward to this saturday as we'll be going Marina Barrage to fly kites as well as a picnic with my sister and Damien^^
Goodnight all, ♥

Sunshine after a heavy rain and storm,

2010-10-29T13:30:00.000-07:00

Aston's was very filling and very affordable for a restaurant. Always fun to hangout with them after so long ^^ Cabbed to baby's house downstairs to meet him to talk things out then baby sent me home after that. Thank you baby for spending such money and sending me home all the way from Amk because of the molester case around my neighbourhood. You're such a sweetie :*

Heading over to Alwin's bbq later together with Geri later. Will be seeing all of my poly classmates later on:) Hehe long time no see^^
Anyway, Happy birthday Alwin! I remember you sending me a super long text on my birthday which melted my heart hehhs. And so I shall write to you here,

Happy birthday Alwin, my bestfriend which shares secrets with me during my poly times.
Although I left you guys halfway,
and didn't manage to continue this poly journey with all of you,
but you should know I am always there for you all.
After all, we're all this together.
You're the one always caring for me when I am down.
I remember when I went back poly to give the parents' letter,
you guys handed me the belated birthday present from the class.
And at that moment I was facing immense stress, if you remember.
You were the one there for me to hear me out.
A big thank you to you Alwin:)
Good luck for any upcoming exams,
I'll probably be your junior next year, LOL.
Or maybe if possible, I will transfer to Tp but I promise I will still keep in touch with you guys.
I love you all ^^

After the bbq later, will be going over to find baby:) I miss you dear~ I am proud of you baby! Keep it up and study hard, you know I love you k!

It's all for one.

2010-10-28T16:38:00.000-07:00

Picked baby up from his school yesterday then accompanied him to enroll for his driving license at Ubi. Not meeting baby today cus his school ends at 6pm. Excited to see him tomorrow hehe^^ Going to the airport later to meet Carolyn for dinner at Aston's.

There's a fucking fish bone stucked in my throat and the doctor can't see it. Fml! SO many problems, -.-

Chan ruk khun mak mak ^^

2010-10-25T00:16:00.000-07:00

Met baby and Damien after their school today. Headed to dte to have Kfc then went back home. Met damien in the evening again for kbox.

Baby you should know how xin fu you are ok! (After reading my cousin's post) ^^ hehehe. Maybe after reading her post you'll have indefinite trust in me:) I love you and I really do. Going over to baby's place for dinner tomorrow. I got to sleep early, I'm tired. Goodnight!

Best experiences,

2010-10-24T04:43:00.000-07:00

Today went Jurong East Swimming Complex with baby. It looks pretty much like wildwildwet, looks more fun than it even! So after before we rent the floats we decided to first try out the yellow slide which didn't require a float. We had 2 tries and there comes the heavy rain with thunders + lightnings -.- Waited in the shelter for 1 hour but the rain doesn't seemed like it was going to stop anytime soon. Disappointed, we washed up and left. So to summarise, each of us had 2 tries on the yellow slide, how great (Y)
Walked through the the rain and headed to Jurong point, wanted to go to Pepperlunch outlet to eat. And only when we reached there we found out Pepperlunch store is in the foodcourt and not an outlet by itself -.-
Then went down all the way to Suntec instead ^^ After eating, went to the fountain of wealth and chilled for awhile before heading back to pasir ris. Went to Dom's chalet for a little while then went to catch 'You again'. It was awesome, hehes:)

Pretty tired, going to turn in now. Goodnight!

Happy 1st.

2010-10-23T00:07:00.000-07:00

Happy 1st monthsary, baby!

Throughout with one month, there are times which I feel like I'm on cloud9 with you. However, there are also bad times together. We can be as happy as nothing can be, we also had very major quarrels I admit that at certain point of times, I do feel very irritated with you. But again, my love towards you had not changed. Everyday, it just grows stronger and stronger:) I'm looking forward to meet you tomorrow and dine together at night, hehes. Baby, I wanna cook for you my chilled marcoroni!! Altho it might not be as tasty as my Mom's, but I will do my best and try to make it as delicious as possible, just for you. And I hope the photo frame will always be on your table so that you will be able to see my face daily, hahahs! Lastly, I love you ♡

Baby run with me,

2010-10-22T10:02:00.000-07:00

Went to Wildwildwet with boyfie, Derrick and my sister. The 3rd time I went there after so long. Then headed to find my sister's friends and I played volleyball using soccerball with dearest:)
It was fun, going to anywhere with dearest's fun actually hehes. Time flies, tomorrow's our 1 monthsary already.
He's coming over to find me from amk now, will be accompanying him to enrol for car license then at night going over to my friend's father's wake.

I'll be there to love you,

2010-10-18T23:28:00.000-07:00

Boyfriend today very gan jiong, 9plus am reached my house. He even woked me up because I said I wanna see him the first thing I wake up in the morning-.-

Currently at his place now, had my dinner here with his family:) Going to the dentist tomorrow or the day after tomorrow, scared~

Twenty-3rd ♥

2010-10-18T01:54:00.000-07:00

Have been on a hiatus for a super long period of time as I didn't have the time to blog. Guess this time round I'll be back to blogging. I hope everyone have not vanished from this site though,

Have been with this silly boy above all these while, :)

Stupidboy,

It was the way he sings that mesmerised me initially. The efforts he put in when he was wooing me. The perserverance he had when I didn't had feelings for him. The unconditional love that he gave me. The fact that he didn't mind about coming down from Amk all the way to Compass point at Sk just to pass me 2 bottles of herbal tea everyday when my throat was sore. The times when he always travel down to pasir ris just to meet me. The addiction I have for kbox ever since I'm with him. The feeling when my heart melts whenever he sings 约定. The way he always gave me his assurance when I thought that I was going to lose him anytime. The shoulders which are always there for me whenever I needed them. The naggings from him to hurry go remove my tumors. The feeling of waking up to his kisses. The warmth he gives me when I'm in his arms. All these made me love him the way he loves me.

And also, I wanna thank you for always giving me the courage to do all that I need to do. For being willing to stay by my side and be there for me through my difficult times. No doubt, I would like to tell you that I will be the girlfriend who's gonna be always there for you at your worst. I would give you my all in this relationship, (L)

Love broke your heart, and brought you lies.

2010-09-17T01:40:00.000-07:00

and you've been hurt and so, your heart has chose to close the door..

Buy mooncakes from me :)

2010-09-08T02:04:00.000-07:00

Work was fucked up today. Until the last two hours, things began to get better. Because Astroboy keep making me laugh, hahaha he is so silly! Left work with him then went whitesands for a super late dinner at mac together. Then sent him off the bus. Tomorrow will be starting work at 12pm, same venue, Compass point at Sengkang. Support me people, buy mooncakes from me kays! FROM ME! Im gonna turn in right now, goodnights:)

All good things,

2010-09-02T04:14:00.000-07:00

Haiyehs, I don't know what went wrong. Have been questioning myself these two days after I felt the change in you. It was supposed to be possible, but you made it impossible. Certain things, cherish it before it's gone. Because you won't know whether it will be back again. This was a lesson I learned in the past.

Just an update, I have stopped going thai discos, and I am gonna stop nightlife too. It brings me more cons than pros. I can do anything, just for you. I know how you feel when guys texts me, when I go thai discos, when I stay out late outside when you're home because of your curfew. For now, I just wanna get a job and keep myself really really busy.

If you happen to see this, I miss you still. And I'm feeling really lousy now at this point of time. Because, you are not the past you anymore, you won't be there as and when I need you anymore, maybe it's just that I can never be good enough for you. I'm doing all that I can already,

Mundane,

2010-08-12T16:59:00.000-07:00

Bubbery everyday, everyday, everyday. Monday, bb with Jason, Kelvin and Jinfeng. Tuesday went Illuma to watch airbender with Ah boy and Yhuy before heading to bubbery. Gabriel and Jinfeng came over to join me. Ytd went bb with Jinfeng. Mundane life, isn't it?

These 2 days Yhuy and I keep fighting and quarrelling. So tired of it, i really don't wish us to quarrel anymore :(

Many tell me thai boys not good, thai boys this and that. I know, but i don't feel the same way too. Overall, i really hate all the arguments we have all the time.

Mai mee tang!

2010-08-03T16:09:00.000-07:00

Monday-

Went to sp to pass letter to school. Met Eugene at bugis then went Illuma to watch The Soccerer's Apprentice, i like the show (Y)

Sent him to bubbery then last minute decided to stay there to drink. I opened jugs only, pok alrdy. Alphonse and Guowei came over. Gw opened martell. This coming friday i wil be going over to thailand:) So thursday wanna go bubbery for the last time before i fly off.

BaikaGirl_93

2010-08-01T19:07:00.000-07:00

Left bubbery earlier than usual yesterday. Nowadays go there sad only. Not like last time, go there and have fun anymore. Seeing you makes me feel so heartwrenching! But i understand,

I don't know if i should head down to bubbery later on, every single day go there also very chor. Straight 4 days went there already. Some more now my leg's condition jialat, maybe tomorrow going see doctor after heading down to school ba. My teacher kaopeh me, say i irresponsible and what shit. Fuck man, i admit i'm lazy to go down because it's so far and because i just want to have fun everyday. Left a bad impression to the directors of the school already hai!

You finally told me the truth,

2010-07-30T16:17:00.000-07:00

Bubbery was a blast yesterday night (Y) Luv it~

Little balloons,

2010-07-28T14:40:00.000-07:00

It's amazing how things always get out of hand when you tried very hard to keep it under control.

Sometimes, it's better to not give a fuck about anything at all. (Y)

Hate the way it is.

2010-07-27T10:39:00.000-07:00

Chan beuua mak mak na!! :(

I used to have alottt to post about. But these few days nothing much because i've been out of the house very little. Not the usual me but it's good in a way or another. What is the world becoming to? It really sucks to be living here, I don't like it at all. My ah boy in camp, having lessons now. He's bored there, while i'm bored over here. Urghh!

Where can i find the answer,

2010-07-26T18:14:00.000-07:00

Being myself,

2010-07-22T09:54:00.000-07:00

It's you, it has always been you.

Power

2010-07-21T22:12:00.000-07:00

Why is it that Thai masters are so powerful? They told my uncle, cause he visited thailand and asked about me. They told him what i've been doing outside, like going thai discos, drinking and even about my latest boyfriend!
Wtf man.

Webcam

2010-07-21T16:27:00.000-07:00

Top of the World,

2010-07-21T02:34:00.000-07:00

I've no idea why i am doing this to myself, just for you. Altho you've been the worse guy i've been together with, but i dno why when i get all serious into r/s, i really am serious. Many people told me it's not worth it doing all these for you, but i just turn onto deaf ears altho i know they mean well for me. I really miss you so much in such a way that i almost lost control of myself. I just want to see you so much. Anyway boy, your tattoo's getting nicer and i'm very happy for you. Sessions after sessions, with all the colourings, it looked great on you:) It's time to let go, actually its long time ago that i should be letting go of this failed relationship. Way back i should have given up. Blame it on myself for just wanting to help you change your temper, just wanting to stay by your side at all times, not even minding the way u treat me. However i still love you. I really need you by my side, the way you take care of me and ensure i'm always safe. I don't know how to put them into words in details but these words are all from the bottom of my heart. I abit sehseh alrdy and buey tong already, need to slp like now. Gnights.

What matters more than you?

2010-07-20T17:34:00.000-07:00

I hate living here, i hate my life, I hate that you were once mine & you're gone for good, I hate that at times you were sweet like no one else can be and at times you were like a big monster, I hate that our memories are stuck in my head and they're on repeat, I hate that i can't stop thinking of you, I hate having to resist not to text you, I hate the feeling of missing you, I hate that i can't see you, I hate that you're going into rtc, I hate that i can't be there for you at your worst anymore, I hate that i yearn so much to be able to wait for your return but i can't, I hate that i met you during your brother's chalet, I hate that things will turn out to be like this, I hate that you treated me so nice at the beginning, I hate that you took my number from your brother, I hate that you took my phone and save your number in it, I hate that i love you.

You don't even know how much you mean to me, motherfucker. You don't even know that in my eyes, you're the best i could ever imagine. You don't even know i've been letting you have your way since the start till now. You don't even know how much pain i went through when you treat me no different from a dog. You don't even know my love for you has not changed, not even a little abit.

If you're reading this, go listen to this song. It always reminds me of you, because of the meaning of the lyrics.
Prik Thai- Waen Gam

To love you is something that I've never regretted.

You know you want me,

2010-07-20T02:29:00.000-07:00

Slept till i happy today, cus i woke up at 6pm. Went to prepare quickly and headed to downtown east and met Gary. Then accompany him go home bathe then Steve came over to pick us up. Drove to changi village and have their nasi lemak. Very delicious nor:) And i'm reminded of you again, i remembered got once when i went ehub with Jf then you texted me to ask if i wanna have nasi lemak and you'll send it over to me because you were going there with your brother. Got home super early today at 12plus am. And i will be turning in early too. The more i slept, the more sleepy i get.

Self denial

2010-07-19T04:54:00.000-07:00

Woke up at 12plus pm today then stayed at home to use the lappy all the way till 10 plus pm at night then went out. Went Westplaza with Jinfeng to meet Kenneth to have my first meal of the day. At there talk cock until Steve come over to pick me up. So, 2 cars came over and set off for some rounding. There was Steve, Gary, Joel, Joel's girlfriend, Benny, Jinfeng and I. Went to Changi beach, then near kallang leisure park there to chill, then went tiong shian porridge centre @ chinatown to eat & hme sweet hme:) Although friends around me are very very nice, but i still love the times when we go rounding together more :(
With you by my side just feel all different and much happier.

I'm dead tired, going to turn in really soon, nights people.

Hate it :[

2010-07-18T14:03:00.000-07:00

I hate living in self denial, thinking about you till i fall asleep & waking up having thoughts of you. Whenever i go to your wall, plenty of girls friend requests accepted. Hai. But afterall, everyone's bound to get hurt one day. It's parts and puzzles of life. We just gotta learn to get up and move on, it's within reach. However, it aint easy. Easier said then done.

I know i've been holding back, not willing to say them out loud.

Happenings,

2010-07-18T06:33:00.000-07:00

Went out at 10plus pm just now, to west plaza to meet Guoping, Kenneth, Jordon, Glenn and Jason. Slacked there till 2plus am then asked Steve to give me a lift to Buberry thai disco while he & his friend went to Clarke Quay. Met Tony and his 3 friends there. Left Buberry at 4am then his friend drove us to Joo chiat to eat wanton mee, they send me home after that. So random that meet Tony lohs, ever since he left Ngeeann very long never talk alrd. We were never even close when he was still in nas to begin with! Hahaha. I'm going turn in now, tired much. Goodnights:)

Brave front

2010-07-17T19:14:00.000-07:00

Altho i still think of you every other moments, altho i always keep our memories in mind, altho i still love you, altho i still have not forgotten our piece of love, but i still have to put on a front as if i've forgotten everything about us. Seeing you moving on so well, kind of makes me feel heart wrenching though.

Nothing changes even when i still love you.

2010-07-17T08:53:00.000-07:00

So yesterday after rounding came back to use the lappy, then met Lydia at 515 to slack at 5plus am. Till 8plus am then go home & use the lappy again. Till 1plus slept and woke up at 4pm sharp! Stayed at home till 10 sth then meet Zhixiang and Junhao to go bedok meet Weisheng to eat prata and accompany him chat as he just booked out. Chilled there till 3plus am then cabbed over to West plaza to meet Guoping, Kenneth, Jordon and Glenn. Timo and another guy joined us. Saw Mervyn there with his girlfriend and Joyce then just chilled together. Some of them drank martell, but i didn't:) Played Unblock Me on iphone and for the very first time, i cleared many levels (78-89), hehehe so happy :]]

About 8am then bused home. Going turn in soon, super tired. For two days like sleep damn little lohs. Nightz people.

I wanna be with you.

2010-07-16T03:59:00.000-07:00

Without you, i'm nothing.

Met Kenneth and Lydia, then went elias mall to chill. Zx and Junhao and Jinfeng came over. Everyone went home while me and Jinfeng sit at my house nearby slack for a little while. Siaokia called me suddenly, then ask me go eat. Soon after he called me then pick me up and went Whampoa for their fuzhou fishball noodles, followed by going mustafa walkwalk then siaokia sent me home. This time round without you by my side, i'm not used to it sighh. I really miss those days when we go rounding together. Honestly speaking, i still couldn't let go. As i've said, our memories beat everything else.

Speechless

2010-07-15T19:52:00.000-07:00

So much for loving you truly. Thanks Keegan, now i know what you are like. If i knew you'll treat me like this, from the start we would have been better off as just good friends. But being happy whenever i'm with you is a fact that i can't deny. The laughters we had about your silly dream and starbucks snack you ordered. Whenever you might need me, i will still fly over no matter where you are. I'm just 8digits away from you be it a call or text. Stay happy always. Take care love.

You'll always be a part of me (L)

2010-07-15T03:10:00.000-07:00

K, 我要谢谢你给的你拿走的一切.

All the best in everything you do. You'll always be part of my memory.
I'm gonna miss waking up to your kisses
and all the joy we had together.
You left me drowning in the tears of memories.
All i could possess now is our happy and sad memories,
and the photo of you that i'd captured.
You're having probation now & i know you'll be staying home to dota all day long.
I wish you all the best on 26 July's court session,
really hope that nothing will happen to you.
Rest assured i'll be praying hard for you.
I still hold onto a glimpse of hope that you will tell me that you want me back.
But i clearly know how much the chances are.

何必跟我我这种无赖, 没大半生还是很失败.

2010-07-14T17:51:00.000-07:00

Overall, you just don't know how much those few weeks meant to me. With you, i always get the sense of security i've always wanted. The way you looked after me when we're outside, whenever i'm hungry you'll get me to eat even when i'm penniless, asking whether i wanna buy anything and saying aiyah don't buy also good can save money, lying on my lap and dazing at me, hitting your iron head against mine, disturbing each other about silly things that we've done, the way you sayang my head and smile at me, the way you look at me with that cheeky smile of yours and saying those sweet nothings, when we ordered mac breakfast due to our empty stomach and helping you order another 4 extra sausages, when you hold me in your arms and said that it's for 'pai dao', the warmth i get from you whenever you hug me super tightly with all your might, the way you kiss my forehead whenever i'm going to bed, the way i wake up to your kisses. They mean th World to me. I don't know why face is so important to you, when you really love someone, face won't be that important to you anymore. I know you said you won't change your mind, but i know you're softhearted in a way. If not when i waited for you downstairs for 2 hours plus you wouldn't have asked me to go up.

I still wanna be with you through all your difficult times and carry out all my promises to you. I want to be there for you when you're at your worst, and wait for your return.

Lastly, do remember everything i once told you. Nothing's a lie. Love you.

Just give it a 2nd shot.

2010-07-14T02:45:00.000-07:00

3 days without seeing you is killing me! I dn wish everything to be over like this. What you're showing me doesn't show me that you love me. Because you aint treating me like how a human should treat a human.

You just don't know what it's like to be me baby. & you will never treasure me until i'm gone.

無賴

我间中饮醉酒很喜欢自由
常犯错爱说谎但总会内疚
遇过很多的损友学到贪新厌旧
亦欠过很多女人

怕结婚只会守三分钟诺言
曾话过要戒烟但讲了就算
梦与想丢低很远但对返工厌倦
自小不会打算

但是仍(在地球)唯独你爱我这废人
出错你都肯去忍
然而谁亦早知不会合衬
偏偏你愿意等

为何还喜欢我我这种无赖
是话你蠢还是很伟大
在座每位都将我踩口碑有多坏
但你亦永远不见怪

何必跟我我这种无赖
没大半生还是很失败
但是你死都不变心跟我拼命捱
就算坏我也不忍心偷偷作怪

没有跟的野种飘忽的命途
谁像你当我宝甚么也做到
旧爱数足一疋布在这刻写句号
只想跟你终老

就算我也不忍心
换转别个也忍心偏偏作怪

On the verge

2010-07-12T21:44:00.000-07:00

And, you are the boy i met.

I srsly got nothing to say. I've been treating you the best that i can afford to, you ask yourself. Didn't i? I've never once complained about the way you treat me, i even said it's okay i will help you along as you try to change. You ownself think, didn't i put in my utmost efforts? I said i will wait for your return when you go in, cause i wanna last with you. Yet you said last long, you laughed and said but not last forever. You think i'm silly to think so far. Ever thought of how much your words had impacted on me? Then now suddenly cannot stay over when you go in, how am i supposed to still stay close with your family. Do you think the same way as your parents, that i'm too young for you? Its just 2 years difference. No matter what will become of us, i will accept it. Because when things at your side become like this, even if i say i love you, does it matter at all?
And you have changed, you used to call me every night without fail, regardless 2am or 430am, when you can't sleep or you wake me up for school, you'd call me just to chat with me for hours. But now, not even a text from you throughout the day. I miss you, but i don't get to see you for 2 days already. And you won't suggest to meet too. I don't know what you are thinking in your mind, another girl or what? If there's any reason, you can just tell me straight what. Haiyah i also don't know what to say already. I call you, you get angry. What's th point in a r/s whereby you have no respect for me and i am supposed to be afraid of you. Fuck it la, how much i love you you will still treat me the same way. You won't treasure things until its gone. Nothing will change.

Deep and meaningless,

2010-07-12T19:25:00.000-07:00

What's th point when you wanna be with the person you love forever but he doesn't think th same way too? I've decided to take things easy. When i care, you get irritated. I should step down a little on my part, think you will prefer this way as well. I just want you to be happy. Whatever it is, i will trust you that you will not lie to me and do anything behind my back. If you ever want to do anything like that, i'd rather you tell me straight and you can just end everything. Instead of me being hidden in the dark. Alright that's all i want to say for now. You're dotaing right now, & i kind of miss you.

Lastly, I chose you because I love you.

:(

2010-07-12T01:17:00.000-07:00

I hate to love.

Love my bibi

2010-07-11T08:12:00.000-07:00

Stayed over at baby's place for the past two days. Rounding with siaokia, went Whampoa st to eat Fuzhou fishball noodles, changi airport to chill at starbucks, east coast to play number balls. Many funny things happened, my baby so cute:) Hehe.

Then yesterday Jinfeng came over. Something happened between baby and i. I really hope there won't be such thing anymore, you really got to change de :(

Everytime i got things i want to talk to you about, but i just don't dare to. Cus u'll say things like don't niam and all. But you got to understand, in a r/s couples need to talk then can bond and get closer. If everything just keep to yourself, where got good? Right or not? And if everytime like this, how to last. The worse is when u told me you won't know whether next time you'll fall for other girls not, sigh! I told you le, i not that kind who geh siao de. I tell you i won't means i won't. I'd rather you care than you don't care about anything, mark my words. Like you said, when we're outside then you more okay, when at home then you kpkb. Honestly, i really don't wish that you treat me like this. And all th promises that you made, are they just empty promises?

If you could lie to me about a small thing, will there be a bigger lie? Right or not? I'm saying serious, if you are serious in this r/s de, if you mean to really last, when you go in, i will wait for you de. I will. But frankly, if you never ever thought of lasting, then you should know what to do already. I can only tell you that when you're okay, we are very sweet together. But we should respect each other and not make it like when i need to talk to you, i'm even afraid to do so.

Happy (Y)

2010-07-09T12:47:00.000-07:00

Ate with Zx, Mikol, Chuan, Jinfeng and my sister. Then Siaokia joined us for kbox session, baby cabbed over from town after he left his friends. Then went back to baby's place:) Just got home, going over later cus at night maybe siaokia driving us out.

17th birthday:)

2010-07-08T16:57:00.000-07:00

Thanks for all th wishes through calls, texts and facebook:)

So basically, i went Meridian Jc to find my boyf aft his soccer together with Jinfeng then cabbed to boyf's place. Thy played ban luck and i was the dealer. At about 1 plus baby gave Jinfeng money to cab home then Siaokia drove baby, their daddy, Bing rong and I to Singapore pools to watch soccer. Admission fee was 50 bux and boyf paid for me. Thank you dearest!

Got back to baby's place then ordered mac delivery then sleeeep. Just cabbed home. Later meeting lovelies:)
This year's 17th birthday was a blast overall, celebration with family was great, i believe with friends will be great tooo:) Love you guys. Not to forget, my babyboy Keegan, I love you :)

Feelings

2010-07-06T19:20:00.000-07:00

The feeling i went through while waiting for hours for your news really sucks. It kept my mind completely occupied, worrying for you and wondering what the final results would be. But i did not even receive a single call or text from you. Till when i finally decided to call you, you sounded angry and hanged on me. I don't know what's going on, why your mom was unhappy when u had a call.

Anyway baby, i just want to tell you that no matter what is the outcome, how long you'll be away from me, i will wait for your return. I can't set my mind at ease once i think about the mental torture that you'll be going through inside. This time round, it'll be for a long period of time. The limited times i'm allowed to visit you are never going to be enough. I really hope when 14th July comes, everything will be fine for you. I hope nothing's gonna happen to you. I will be praying for you dearest. I promise you i will take good care of myself, i will be your good girl alrights. There are just so many other things that's in my mind which i wanna tell and ask you, but i just don't know how to put them into words whenever you're in front of me.
I luv you.

I love the great friends i have by my side. It's true, those you know the longest are the truest friends. And this coming thurday, i've them planning something for me. But all of their lips are sealed -.-
Anw, thanks for th thoughts babies:)

I'd like to thank DBA 13 too, heard from Mr Howard the gift you guys got me:) Altho i'm leaving you guys, but no worries i'll never forget this class.